How do you justify your time???

On a recent face book post a friend of mine posted the following question (and I'm paraphrasing) 'How do people justify going to the gym rather than spending time with their family ... I just dance around the living room with my boys.' I'll admit that when I first read it my thought was 'do I have to justify it? Should I feel guilty for wanting to take time to myself?' I mean we do a LOT together ... I let her in the bathroom to play in the sink while I poop for petes sake. It was quickly followed by me thinking 'Why the hell should I have to justify anything to you.' Now let me say that this girl is someone that I would consider a friend and I don't think she meant anything by her comment. I would never fault her for asking a simple question. It also got me thinking. I did respond with the fact that I put Marley to bed and then go to the gym. But I do think it's important to take time for yourself, make yourself better etc. Dancing around my living room is not enough to take care of the muffin top that I have going on! haha. Here is what has continued to bother me. As a first time mom it took me a LONG time to realize that I desearve time to myself and I shouldn't feel guilty for taking it or wanting it. Of course, a night away or an hour at the gym is different then spending every night in the bar, but I think you get what I'm saying. The guilt associated with being a mom (for me at least) can be huge. An example? When Mar was just a little babe I hardly left the house. Looking back I know that I was dealing with some mild depression on top of being majorly sleep deprived. But I HATED it when Ben would go out. It made me resent him. Why didn't he feel for our daughter what I felt? Why didn't he need to be with her 100% of the time? I even felt guilty for wanting a SHOWER by myself. But it caused a lot of problems for us. Now that Marley is older and I have learned that doing stuff on my own is wonderful sometimes, I feel like we have a great system worked out. Ben and I go and do our own things when we want to while the other one (typically) stays at home with Mar. For instance? I'm going out tonight with girl friends while Ben stays home. This weekend on Saturday I slept in while Ben and Mar ran errands, got breakfast and visited with nana. Sunday Ben slept while Mar and I went out to get groceries and have breakfast. It makes me LOVE our 'alone time' together and also love that Ben gets his own special daddy daughter morning too. The point to my ramblings in that it's OK ... for us at least ... to do your own thing. To not let go of yourself just because you are a mommy. Yes I am Bens wife and Marleys mommy ... but first I was me. And I will not be made to feel guilty for wanting to make myself better. Whether it be my going to the gym, going out with friends or taking a shower on my own.